10 Financial Mistakes That Can Ruin Your Marriage
Money plays a bigger role in relationships than most couples expect, and the research is hard to ignore. SunTrust Bank found that 35% of people say money is the primary source of trouble with their partner, while Fidelity reports that 45% of couples argue about finances at least occasionally. Those numbers illustrate how quickly everyday choices can lead to something significant. Here are 10 financial mistakes that can impact your marriage negatively.
Hiding Money
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Studies from the National Endowment for Financial Education reveal that 2 out of 5 couples admit to lying about money, and 75% report that it has damaged their relationship. Financial secrets are often discovered, and the shock alone can alter how secure someone feels in the relationship.
Overspending
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When one partner spends freely without checking in, resentment builds fast. Overspending tends to cause conflict when one person earns more and feels the financial pressure more directly. A simple agreement to save a set percentage of income provides both partners with a baseline and reduces the likelihood of surprise purchases.
Hiding Debt
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Many couples discover secret balances only when it’s too late, and the fallout can be intense. CreditCards.com found that 31% of people think hiding accounts is worse than physical infidelity. Debt isn’t just a number. It affects long-term stability, living expenses, and how secure a couple feels about planning for the future.
Underspending
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Being too frugal can also cause problems. Newman points out that extreme penny-pinching can create embarrassment in social settings and frustration at home. A financial advisor can help alleviate the tension by providing both partners with a plan that feels reasonable.
Materialism
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Prioritizing things over connection can weaken marriages. When a household revolves around constant upgrades and luxuries, partners feel pressure to keep up rather than relax. That shift adds stress, and the emotional distance grows.
Conflicting Money Values
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Couples often discover that they see money differently. One may view it as a security measure, while the other regards it as a tool for fun. Couples who argue about money weekly are over 30% more likely to divorce than those who argue a few times a month. Mismatched values make every financial decision feel like a negotiation.
Opposing Money Styles
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Saver-spender couples show up constantly in research. These mismatched styles can work, but they need structure. Dew’s study, “Bank on it: Thrifty Couples are the Happiest,” found that feeling like a spouse spends foolishly raises the risk of divorce by 45%. The issue is less about the dollar amount and more about the sense of instability.
Power Plays
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When one partner earns significantly more or controls family wealth, money becomes a tool for decision-making rather than collaboration. Fidelity’s findings show that couples with better communication feel more confident about their financial future, so shutting someone out of financial decisions creates stress and imbalance.
Family Responsibilities
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Helping a sibling with rent or paying for a parent’s emergency can turn into big arguments if both partners aren’t on the same page. Major life events can push emotions to a high level, and it’s easy for one person to feel overlooked when money intended for shared plans is diverted elsewhere. Even experts suggest creating a clear policy before issues pop up.
Refusing Joint Planning
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The kind of couples who avoid discussing major goals tend to get into the same fights repeatedly. Fidelity reports that couples who communicate openly are far more likely to feel ready for retirement. A monthly or quarterly check-in keeps each person aware of spending habits, debt, and goals, and that transparency makes even tough discussions easier.